Dhoom 3 - Every Magic Trick Has Three Parts

Sunday, December 22, 2013

In case you are a movie buff like me, you must have guessed a lot of content of this post just from the title! However, in the interest of everyone else, let me just put this alert!


Since you are still reading, I am almost sure you are one of those people who will not be spending a bomb watching this in theater. Dhoom 3, as per my expectations, was just going to be just another franchise movie - and as it goes with the franchise movies, no one gives a shit about the story! Franchise movies keep on reaping the benefits of the one thing that ticks with the audience and keep of repeating it till the producers or the audience gets fed up.

Obviously, in Dhoom franchise, the thing that ticks with the audience isn't either Uday Chopra or Abhishekh Bacchan - its the bikes! PS: Somebody needs to tell Uday and Abhishek that! In a nation, where every middle class youngster driving a 125cc bike thinks himself to be a super biker, I guess YRF really hit a goldmine!

However, you see the new guy in the poster below? He made every bit of an effort to make people not hate the movie! You know, people say Aamir reads scripts and doesn't do meaningless films. Also, people say Dhoom movies are totally baseless, storyless and full of crap! You mix these two and you get Dhoom 3!


There are some things so stupid, that you start believing that its another Chennai Express, and then there are oh-so-Aamir-esque intense scenes, that they take you somewhere else!

So, Aamir does reads scripts; its just that he doesn't watch English movies! Ab English movies me to stories hoti hi hai, to wahi se chori kar lete hain!

The dark knight - So the movie starts in a sepia tone, with an old Jackie Shroff fighting the biggest villains of modern era - banks! - and then goes ahead and kills himself! Suiciiiiiiiide! Aamir khan grows up suddenly, and turns into - guess what - Joker! (The Clown)

The Prestige - Every magic trick has three parts, first the writers watch an intense and acclaimed English movie, second, they blatantly copy the plot, third, they add an emotional flood to it, and voila! Dhoom 3! The whole movie pivots around Aamir's double role! That's how he does the famous trick - Vanishing from spot 1, and appearing at spot 2, in less than 10 seconds!

Transformers - A BMW bike, which can run on road for more than 30 seconds without killing people - contrary to the popular opinion of BMW machines in India. And then it suddenly turns into a water scooter (yeah, the same one we ride in Goa), and then into a submarine, and then into a boat and then bike.

Oh, and there are 3 other key people in the movies - The first one is an american, with the most ice cold expressions I have ever seen. I guess his previous profession was being the CEO of Lehman Bank - he wouldn't have flinched a bit before firing 10,000 people in an hour! The second one is a hot american chick, but then there was no time for writing dialogues for her. She just mentions in her introduction - I have Indian friends, so I know a little Hindi!

And then we have Katreena - trust me on this, since they showed Eli Avram on TV, Katreena looks a 50 year old lady, who was once very cute ! Not much dialogues for her as well, but they gave her some tattered pieces of clothes, so that no one notices the acting and dialogues !


The only saving grace, and an amazing effort at that was Aamir's double role! Aamir, without any change in looks, has played two separate personalities so bloody well, that in one scene he transforms from Sahar to Samar and the difference is so very visible in microseconds, that it completely blew me away!

As it is visible from the movie poster, it is Aamir's movie, with everyone else supporting him - except from Physics and Logic that is.

Overall, I will give the movie 2.5 stars, but will not stop you from watching it once - only for Aamir!

Oh, and as it happens with each Dhoom movie - Instead of being caught by Uday Chopra, each villain prefers to rather die by jumping from a cliff! 
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