Be Right Back!

Thursday, November 25, 2010

No phone, no internet, no emails, no facebook!! 

Cya all after about 10 days! 

BRB - Be Right Back

Its the CRAZY marriage season again !!

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Yeah, its that time of the month.. oops.. year again! :P

But you know what! This year its a bit special. ( oh yeah you lovey dovey ones, stop smiling, this line was not written for you!) Because - This year, fucking 11 guys i know are getting married between November and January! (Yeah i even know 4 girls getting married, but those cases are covered when i said 11 guys, as they are marrying the guys i know. ufff...this whole marriage thing is so much complicated! )

But seriously, this is the largest massacre of the most eligible bachelors i have ever seen! But i guess, someday, it had to happen! Phew! Please accept heartiest condolences from the Drunk-and-High-Bachelors-Association! 

On a serious note, i was really surprised seeing wedding invites from 2 out of those 11 guys. I mean, i never thought that a girl would even talk to those two, leave alone marriage! One spits while he talks and the other one has got heart attack two times by just seeing his own face in the mirror! :D :D  I know i am mean, so say something else.. :P

So leaving those two guys out, and then two more for whom their parents found the matches :P . Dude! Seven awesome people whom you would generally find wearing aviators, riding bikes, drinking booze, will be seen sporting a mustache, wearing a chashma and carrying sabjee from the market January onwards! Aah, they should have read my blog before deciding to get married! 

Ok! Time to shut up now... 

So there is this weird thing which i have observed. Whenever two of my closest friends are marrying in almost about the same time, my company sends me off some 7000-8000 kms! Grrr!  Last time it happened (link), and this time again its happening! Out of the 11, i will only be attending only one marriage during my trip back to India. (my cousin's wedding) (link)

So a very big sad smiley saying sorry and a big smiling smiley wishing all the best to my closest buddies whose marriage i will be missing - Arun - Charu  and  Saurabh - Veena. I will miss your weddings guys and that too by just a week :(   

Anyways, so its time for you guys to say bbye to daru parties, aawaragardi, and some of the other stuff  :D :D .. but here is a short message i found on the net to cheer you up :D

Shopping Time!

Sunday, November 14, 2010

I have discovered it lately, that i do not dislike shopping!

I mean its a real pain going shopping with your mom, sis or gf, as you tend to drink tonnes of coke, have some buckets of sweetcorn, 2 plates of alu chaat and come back to discover that they have finally shortlisted 5 dresses out of the whole store. And now, they just need to finalize one out of those 5. Phew! Time to have round 2 of the coke, corn and chaat! :P :P

Oh well, if you are one of the unlucky fellows, you might need to skip the foodie stuff and stand outside the changing room for hours to comment on what looks fine and what not. Though your opinion will be turned down anyways! :D ( Come on, dont be shy, every real man goes through this embarrassment some day! We are all together in this :D )

But anyways, we are not talking about that today..

I have always been a fan of the stores which also sell online. Just log in, pick up that book or that wireless router and you are gone in 60 seconds! But these days, i am loving the shopping experience in the Hyper-Marts here! They are really of the size of football fields! :D :D Right from a pen, to any types of food items, to clothes, car accessories, electronics (including TV and fridges) and God knows what, these guys have every single thing!!

Yeah, i know i am talking like a village guy, who goes into a big city and sends a handwritten letter by snail-mail to his hometown describing the biiig city! But seriously, food + clothes + cars + electronics in the same store, i have not seen them anywhere. I think i see a big business opportunity when i come back to India. ;) With a slight modification though, i will keep couches or seats at every few meters, saala, is umra me ek sath itna chala nahi jaata! :D :D

But the funny thing is, in the same mall (where this hyper-mart is), there is this baba aadam ke zamaane ka movie hall! I logged in to its website to book a ticket for the famous facebook movie, after which everyone is going crazy these days. And guess what! The website developer forgot to install the shopping cart software on that website! You can book the ticket, select your show and seats, enter your name and information, but cant pay, and have to reach 45 minutes before the show to pay and pick up the tickets! I swear to God, if i knew how to talk in Romanian, i would have definitely went and asked - So why did you create a website in the first place? :P

I guess these guys are countering recession in the wrong way! Instead of cutting down on the special agents who keep on roaming around during the movie to make sure no one is doing chiggi-wiggi in the hall, these guys cut down their ecommerce hosting costs :P :P

Coming back to the topic of me liking shopping, i realized it today while checking my expenses for this month. I don't think i will ever use about 55% of the stuff i bought in the last 30 days! And i don't even know why i bought it in the first place! I guess that is a big sign of liking shopping. isn't it ? :D :D

Aah, i just got an idea about diwali gifts for next year...

Wordless Someday

Thursday, November 11, 2010

I was checking out some of the blogs on my Google Reader list and i came across this fad, where people have officially started taking a weekend sort of a break from blogging once a week. They call it wordless Wednesday or wordless Sunday or whatever. Mostly they put up some lazy pictures on their blogs with senti messages typed on them, using the most irritating font of all times - Comic Sans MS! Anyways, apart from that font, even those messages are so senti that they could make people cry! Sniff! Dekha, meri bhi aankhon me aansu aa gaye! :P

Anyways, the most sadist people on this planet, sit on my Google chat list! When they have nothing else to shut up my mouth, they ask me this pinching question - So, how was your Diwali! And for your kindest information, i would like to call it - Not Bad at all!

Actually in parts, it was super awesome! Around 5.30 pm i went out of the office to washroom or somewhere. Hardly 5 minutes later,  i entered the office and the view was, its indescribable in words, but i would call it -  magical! Imagine a biggg office, not of the size of a football field but somewhat of the size of living area in the Bigg Boss ! Lights were switched off, and the whole place was shining in the lights of candles, which were placed on each desk! And the best part was shining faces in those candle lights, smiling on my confused, amused and startled expressions! Here are a few pics (with subtitles :D :D :D ). They don't fully justify the beauty because lights were off, but give a fair idea ...

Diwali in Romania
Furobiker's Workstation!

The Sweets!

The best part was that i am the only Indian in this office! And these guys didn't know a thing about Diwali till a day back, but still they took the pain to plan out the surprise and get candles and stuff! Some things are pretty awesome, aren't they! I guess we all need little surprises at times to cheer up the rainy days...  :)

Indian Masterchef is here

Sunday, November 07, 2010

Nah i am not going to talk about the reality show with a similar name. We never talk about that stuff (link) here. :D This is my blog and I will be the Indian Masterchef for today. Waise, i never though in my life that i would enter the kitchen, leave alone cooking! I was born to change the world, make a time machine or something but look at me here, sitting in my teeny weeny apartment, i am cooking three square meals a day, and that too on a - what would have been hot and happening Saturday back in India!

These Europeans are strange people, they do not hire house-maids (kaam-waali-bai) for the most essential stuff like cooking, cleaning, washing clothes and stuff. And what you shouldn't hire - babysitters and nannies - these guys have loads of them!  (On a logical note, i guess its something to do with minimum wage rates and stuff, hence, the cost of a housemaid would easily exceed the cost of food n beer, so people make the obvious choice :D )

If you guys allow me to digress from the topic, i often start speaking crazy things, so coming back to the topic! I was the Indian MasterChef this saturday, and i am going to bore you with the description and pics. (I guess some of the email subscribers cant see the attached images, i am afraid you got to visit the blog to see them )

The day begun with a lazy feeling after the hindi movie marathon on Diwali eve, and i woke up at the usual-bachelor-weekend-waking-up-hour of 1pm! Being one of those who are always hungry, i had to do something to save my life! With a heavy heart and full sympathy towards myself, i inched towards the kitchen. All useless packed stuff loaded with preservatives! Phew. Then i remembered the jaadoo-ki-potli! There is a special pack, loaded with quick to make Indian stuff, i got from India. You know for the nostalgic foodie-pangs. I settled my eyes on my favorite breakfast - Pohe! Whack-a-doodle! and then add a cup of tea to make the complete Indian breakfast!

Pohe and Chai !! 

Like most of you girls do on seeing a pink colored teddy bear - Oh my Gaaawd! Isnt it a cutiepieeee! Yeah, i did the same dance on seeing my Pohe! :D

As they say, sher ke muh khoon lag gaya tha. My mistake! I proudly declared to myself, if i can cook breakfast, then lunch is no big deal! I will never learn from my mistakes it seems! Like the atta-maida potluck party failure last week, something similar happened this time also! The variety of rice we get here, are damn fucking sticky! So what you are going to see in the next picture is actually fried rice, though it looks like a cake of rice!

Looks like fried Rice. Isn't it?

You know a man can reduce the amount of problems in his life to an absolute zero if he just removes two things from his life - Ego and Chicks! Well you have to be a gay to remove the second option but certainly we all should try for the first one. I learnt this piece of gyaan later at night! After the lunch time fried rice cake fiasco, i had to do a saving grace job! And what can be better than the national dish of punjab! The Butter Chicken!!! (Or in my case, The Kadhai Chicken)

I used my four years of job experience, basically searching stuff on , and found the easiest recipe to make The Kadhai Chicken! Cooking chicken is a real tough job, i realized it after i had started the process! Buying a KFC burger would have been a much better option! But touch-wood, the chicken i made, was fucking awesome!! The masala was on the higher side,  and the butter was floating, but then that is what makes an authentic Punjabi Dish! Please find attached the before and after pics for your perusal! (Damn you client emails, see i have started writing corporate email shit over here also! )

The Kadhai Chicken ! 

Kadhai Chicken and Rumali Roti were here 5 minutes back !! 

Phew!! As they say, All is well that ends well!

PS: Mom - Dont be too happy reading this, i wont enter the kitchen after i come back to India, this is just for the survival you see. Oh unless you keep a knife on my throat...

Diwali Greetings!

Wednesday, November 03, 2010

First of all, Wishing you a very happy Diwali!

Eat lots of sweets and burst a lot of crackers, specially near the home of the neighborhood hot-chick who always roams around with the big black dog! Yeah, dogs are pretty scared of the crackers, but on the positive side, she will not know who did that mischief and will probably start disliking all the dudes of the society!. As guru furobiker once said, Woh meri nahi ho saki, to kissi aur ki bhi nahi ho sakti! :D :D :D

Jokes apart, the only and the consistent memory i have of Diwali, and i am sure it will the same with you, is not of crackers and sweets! Its something much more intense and earth shattering! YES! The discussions between mom and the neighborhood aunties on ...

"What are you giving your kaam-wali-bai this diwali?" !! 

Dude! If you have not seen those discussions, you are missing a bigg part of your life! I am sure our finance minister will not think that much while designing the budget of India, as these aunties do! Right from the money, to the epitome of Indian culture - Saree! 

If any of the females from the society gives a better saree to her kaam-wali-bai than others, God save the other households! Every one should give the same, special, zaree-wali silk saree, and yeah the colors should be different! Or else, be ready for the corpses of dead mouses hidden in the weird corners of your house! :D :P

But during all this festivities, we tend to forget about those people, who are not lucky enough to enjoy the best and the biggest festival of the year. Everyone is busy thinking about the gifts to be given to all known and unknown contacts on their mobile phones, buying loads of crackers, new dresses and tonnes of sweets, which eventually get thrown into the dustbin, but no one has a single minute to think about those who can not buy crackers, or send gifts! 

Wait a minute, you guys are too rushy! Now dont pick up your bag and start running towards the nearest NGO to get some tax benefits! I was talking about myself, damnit! Sitting away, 7603 kilometers and 312 meters away from my home, i am terribly missing Diwali this year! There are no crackers here, no diyas and forget about gifts! Hell, people dont even know what Diwali is! If you tell someone - I am missing Diwali, they will ask - Your girlfriend? :P  :(   :(

Anyways, i have found some 10 candles in the shape of the Diya, and will probably get some sweets to the office on that day. But those back in India, recession time is over folks, most of my friends have shifted jobs to go to awesome paying companies! So bring out the money, burn a lot of crackers, and lets rock the first post-recession Diwali of this millennium! :D  

Once again, wishing you all a Very Happy and Prosperous Diwali! May maa Lakshmi showers tonnes of blessings in your household! 

PS: Dont even ask how did i come up with 7603 km and 312 meters figure! Took me a total of 20 minutes to find my Delhi home and my Romania apartment on the Google maps, and then it was pretty easy! :D

Yes! I am a nerd! 

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