Couple of days back i went to this famous fast food chain, which has all its walls painted with the face of a creepy old man, who claims to be from Ken-tikky! Trust me, that was the most annoying burger of my life!

They have this offer where you get a burger, fries and cola for 10 LEI, whereas, if you take only the burger, it will cost you 9 LEI. Being the idiot I am, I ordered only the burger .. and their began the most irritating 10 minutes of my life ... BTW, do not start finding grammatical mistakes in the chatter below, people here really talk like that!



ME: Can I have a zzz burger please. No fries, no cola.
Waitress - You take no burger. You take Burger, Fries and Cola. Only un Leiu more.
ME: (In my head - Teri maa ki! Tu hoti kaun hai mujhe batane wali ki I no take burger! GRRR! ) - I only take burger. I no take cola, I no take fries!
(yeah, sometimes i have fun in talking in the local language :D )
Waitress: You not understand! I give you benefits! (oh tere ki! ek cola ke badle benefits?)
ME: You not understand. Cola and Fries give me potty problem! :D :D
(desperate attempts to shut her up ! )
The conversation went on for some 3-4 minutes more... Phew

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Most of the people don't know that Banaras is the largest potato producing city in the world! It produces millions and millions of tonnes of potatoes. Yeah, it never gets reported in the papers because all the potatoes produced there are cheaply procured and fed to the students studying in BHU before the news leaks out! For 4 freaking years, we used to get potatoes in breakfast, lunch and dinner! And the days, when our Maharaj was happy, we used to get potatoes in the evening snack also.. So you can understand the mental trauma i had eating those fucking potatoes 3 times a day, 365 days a year for 4 years!! And kids, thats why I HATE fries...

Uh, about the No Cola thing... You know the difference between a cold drink and a slush? The cold drink is a liquid whereas a slush is ..err.. semi-solid! I wanted to give a better example, but then, too many people think its gross to talk about food and upset stomach at the same time. :D :D Since I wanted to pack the stuff and take it home for dinner, i didn't want a cold drink. Last time it became kind of slush, because of the bloody cold here, while i was walking back home! And i HATE slush, it reminds me of. err.. upset stomach! :P :P
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Well well, that poor girl thought it was a language problem that I was not able to understand that I will get "Benefits" if I take the package deal. Wrong! It was a psychological problem, which no benefits can cure :D (Oh dear God! Why did you have to make the spelling of psychological so hard!)

Anyways, a couple of minutes and some angry stares later i got my zzz burger.

Waitress: Your burger, No fries and No cola
ME: Thank you young lady!
Waitress: (in her head - stupid Indians, Not know how to take benefits!)
ME: (In my head - LoL @ what you said in your head! buy a Wren and Martin please...)