Happy budday hai ji

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Remember your last irthday? When some old female relatives (whom you have the chance of meeting only in shaadis) call up your home.. They have a strange habit, they do not consider you important you talk to you even if it is your birthday..They will call you up on your birthday and as you are expecting calls from all the beautiful gals around the world(rakhee sawant if you are lukky) for your 30 seconds of fame when they say happy budday, ask for treat and keep the phone! So these old female relatives call up and say "beta mummy se baat karana" .. and then they talk to whole family and wishing them " munde de janamdin di lakh lakh badhaiyan!!" and then keep the phone!! i mean wtf!

Anyways birthday celebrations in office are real great. You gotta treat 10 morons and 20 weirdest looking females so that that one mast maal comes and attends your treat! And if you are lukky enough you can have handshakes with her and maybe share a piece of cake.. and probably comment like Mr pakistani prezident that shes looking plain gorgeous!

Most of my friends are going mad about job opportunities in West bengal! People are ready to give up their bonuses, have a cut in the salary and leave behind that sexy looking female colegue just to get in West Bengal..reason? More than 50% of the times it is Bandh.. Who doesnt like such a relaxing life! Petrol prices hike, TATA comeing to WB, TATA leaving from WB, mantriji lost his dog, opposition leaders car wasnt cleaned properly, some heroin wore a skirt above her ankles.. you name it and WB will be band for that !!!

Anyways why did i name this post as happy budday? Just to wish Google Uncle a happy birthday.. It has been a real great journey you folks.. And looking back on our lives google ha shighly impacted it.. Weather you gotta spy on your boyfriend/collegue, or searching about finding latest porn site, to finding any damn thing on this plannet.. all you have to do is to Google it! .. Nice work people.. Kudos!!

Koi is post ka title bata do

Saturday, September 20, 2008

I am back! Sounds as if i went to a tour of Europe with 20 hot super models and came back exhausted and drained out ! (whatever that means!)
Work is keeping me busy, that doesnt mean i am working too hard these days, but my office people have barred all personal mailing and blogging etc things.. So i cant help it.. And net at my home! uske kya kehne! It works like old fiat 1821 model.. Chalta kam hai rukta zada hai! Welcome to India!

Well i suddenly remembered this post of mine (click to read). Reason being i was doing same thing today! She was leaving for hyd for some days and i was giving instructions.. Read on

ME: Dhyan se jaana.. dont take your hand out of the window
She: Windows can not be opened in a plane!!

Me: Whatever.. aur haan, do not get down in between!
She: WTF! Do you think i can fly????

ME: okies but then take some food from here only, get it packed.. and when the plane people start selling a sandwich for RS 130 then u also start selling full meal for 100Rs.. flight ka thoda kharcha nikal jayega!
She: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.. bakwaas band kar!

:D :D :D

Then it was her turn to give instructions...
She: Dont look at girls, dont booze, go to office and directly go to home, no roaming around in between.. and .. Dont look at girls, dont booze, go to office and directly go to home, no roaming around in between .. and .. Dont look at girls, dont booze.. and dont look at other girls!!!
ME: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.. tu bhi bakwaas band kar!!

:D

Anyways chalta hai.. Life has been bad lately.. All i do whole day is get up.. go to office (yes i skip bath many times :D ).. work there till owls start flying outside.. then come back, eat and then sleep.. Ek din mom pakka bolne wali hai.. YE GHAR HAI ..DHARAMSHALA NAHI !!!!!

Cant help.. :( Is paapi pet ke liye kya kya karna padta hai!

Though i am a secular person

Sunday, September 14, 2008

but after this happening, i strongly feel something should be done. Less said is better. Period

Ok - TATA - Horn - Please

Friday, September 12, 2008

This is like a mast jhapad on the face of West bengal.. chataaak.. Tata said tata and the whole WB is running after him.. Thats the power which even politicians dont enjoy!

Neways as per the expectations of many people, the world did not end. Although the media people took care that most of the people should commit suicide before the world ends. It was breaking news on every channel with lots of pandits sitting on various channels predicting based on their extensive calculations that world would end at exact 12.30.
I must say these channels have nothing good to do. couple of days back the breaking news was mantriji ka kutta kho gaya. The news of national importance lies hidden in the non peak times. The sweet, cool , demure, sophisticated, decent and good looking Rakhee Sawant is coming on dus ka dum next week.. please switch off your TV sets if you wanna look at her with buri nazaren!!

Google is back to its shanapanti again. It had a term in its T&C that gave it the right of all the content created through it! Seems it doesnt know that we do have intelligent people like rakheeji in this country to catch such things. Finally it has removed the clause.

As i told you some days ago... internet in my office is as good as mallikas dressing sense. I cant access the blogroll.. neither cani read my own blog ( no one else reads it anyways).

And if you people remember a thing called Kahi Ankahi on my blog.. it will be back from next week.. Keep watching..

Pagalpan ki bhi had hoti hai

Sunday, September 07, 2008


kya bakwaas hai ye?

Kyunki saas bhi kabhi bahu thi

Friday, September 05, 2008

Nopes i dont intend to write anything about tulsi mayya here.. This post is just to wish my mom a very happy teachers day.. She is the best teacher in the world (although she slaps too hard if you dont complete your homwork!!)

By the way, why did i write this title? Read on.. and this is true conversation

I return from the office as usual around 10pm .. mom makes a sullen face and throws rotis on my plate (jaise jail mein kaidiyon ke aage dalte hain or gali ke kutte ko)..

Me: Wassup?
She: Aj mere baare mein poochne ki fursat kaise mil gai
Me: Kya hua?
She: Han han, now u dont have time for us.. Whole day in office and rest of the time talking to ur gf .. do you remember when was the last time u pulled my leg on your blog?
(oh.. am i getting close to the root cause or is it going towards something else?)

ME: WHAT??
She: earlier your posts mentioned so much about me.. and now all my friends point out that you mention her more than me..!! (to pehle joote kyu marti thi meri maa .. jab bhi main sach sach likhta tha sab?)
Me: grrrrrrrrrrr
She: sab ladke ek jaise hote hain.. shaadi ke baad joodu ke gulam ban jaate hain .. tu to pehle se ban gaya..

n i was like LOOOOOLLLL

Sometimes its soo hard to understand female species...

Main gayab to nahiiiiiiii

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Doesnt it sound like main shayar to nahi? Dont worry it wont.. I sing as good as Rakhee Sawant's english.. N wait wait.. before u start talking about me and rakhee, there is nothing going between us... we are just friends :P
I know girls must be jumping out there from 30-30 manzil unchi buildings due to my absence from the blogworld.. Shouting abhiiiiiiiiiiiii wchich echos till 2 kms.. but i am not to be blamed for that..
IT department of my company has decided to block all gmail, yahoomail, chatting things and blogging things etc etc.. every personal thing.. So i am cut off from the world during daytime.. and the internet connection at home is like only for downloading stuff.. nuthing more works on my baba adam ke zamane ka PC.
Finally google has launched its own browser called Chrome.. Its _awesome-fuckingly-good_ bole to ekdum jhakaas.. do try it out..

By the way.. ever went to shopping with female species?? Dont go .. its a very bad idea.. selecting one top takes 35 mins +.. and if you add trying it out and other things it totals 45 mins+
And and and.. the most important part.. you get under 4 seconds to judge.. i mean when ur gf is coming outta try room till the place you are standing.. if u cant guess and give the same verdit as she has decided about that top.. you are a dead chicken.. your choice is the worst.. outdated. weird.. sometimes even junglee also.. phew..

Some of the most weird reasong i have ever heard.. i dont have matching footwear(with the top??!!) , it doesnt suit my hairstyle(huh!) , it doesnt go with my rooms paint color, my friends hav this color top , i cant take this i already had the same kinda top eight years ago when i was in 11th class(bachaaaaaaaaaaao)

Neways i can go on n on on this topic.. maybe some other time .. for now cheers! hic